A Very Claris Christmas (Party)

December 24, 2009    Category: Albino Bowler   No Comments »

IMG_3260     Anyone who has ever been around our company or stopped by our offices knows that Claris Networks has a very unique culture and atmosphere.  We pride ourselves in being a light-hearted and fun place to work… and quite frankly our Christmas parties reflect that as well.  This year we did things slightly different and had the get together at our offices; oh, and we had a ping-pong (sorry Andy; “table tennis”) tournament and RockBand throw down.  Yeah… that’s how we roll.  :)   Obviously the Albino Bowler wasn’t missing out on what was quite possibly the best Christmas Party ever.

    The ping-pong tournament turned out to be a wild success.  It was a single elimination tournament and then the final two played to the best of three games.  Much to Zac’s dismay, the tournament came down to a tale of two Daves… David Stilwill and Dave Sagraves, with Sagraves taking the top title and walking away with the prize money.  Make no mistake though, it was an intense battle all the way to the top; with Jay Norris even breaking out his table tennis alter-ego, Arlandro; complete with headband and sunglasses.

    If you weren’t playing ping-pong or out on the porch, chances are you were engaged in an epic game of RockBand.  This particular video game has been a part of our company’s culture for a while and this is actually the second appearance it has made at a Claris Christmas party.  It seemed that the second go around people were a lot less shy about grabbing the microphone and belting out some lyrics… which always makes the experience more entertaining.

    All in all I think everyone, including the Albino Bowler, had an awesome time at the get together.  The food was awesome, the entertainment was great, and best of all we all got the chance to hangout and goof around for several hours.  Good times indeed. 

Have a Merry Christmas everyone!

– Dan Thompson

Claris Networks and the Albino Bowler would like to say a special Thank You to our friends Jay Waggoner and Co. over at Veristor for sponsoring our Christmas party.  Thanks guys!

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NoSHAVEmber: Fun with Facial Hair

December 8, 2009    Category: Albino Bowler   No Comments »

    I don’t know who came up with it, or when and where it started… but fellow employee Jay Norris introduced the office to NoSHAVEmber (you may have heard it called “No Shave November”) this year; and being the bunch of nerds that we are… it caught like wildfire.  The idea is simple: you don’t shave for the entire month of November.  Now several people took this a little further than others.  Some, like Zac, didn’t touch a razor to their face nor scissors to their hair all month long.  Others, like Jay, decided it was acceptable to shave your neck… just

not your entire face.  It was actually a pretty amusing little experiment.  We found that some people, like Samat, still can’t grow a beard… and we’re quite sure that Jeff is actually Santa Claus (we think it all turns white closer to Christmas).  I, on the other hand, could not last the entire month.  I made it 8 days and had to give up.  I came to the realization that having a beard and being completely bald looks quite ridiculous… and is quite itchy to boot.  All in all we apparently generated enough buzz about the whole thing that local radio personality Kim Hansard from Star 102.1 wrote a commercial about it for

a local business that does laser hair removal (listen to it below)!  Now THAT is pretty funny stuff in my book.

   Do you know someone who participated in NoSHAVEmber?  Post up in the comments section and link to a picture!  We’ll all enjoy a good laugh I’m sure.

– Dan Thompson

 
icon for podpress  NoSHAVEmber Ideal Image Ad: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

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    Okay, so I have a couple of things to admit here… 1) I’m not the biggest football fan in the world and 2) I’ve never been to a pro sporting event of any kind.  Well… unless of course you count our local hockey team.  I will very rarely turn down the opportunity to try something new though, so when our friends Jay Waggoner and Ashby Lincoln from Veristor invited my boss Aaron Sherrill and I to a Tennessee Titans game, I was fired up… and so was the Albino Bowler!

    Aaron and I met up at the office and made the relatively short drive over to the stadium in Nashville.  I had heard for years that the pro football games lacked the intensity of college football, so I was pleasantly surprised to find that there wasn’t any shortage of excitement around the stadium… the fans were out BIG TIME.

After walking around for a couple of minutes, we caught up with our friends and headed inside.  Now, Aaron had actually been to a couple Titans games before, so I think he had an idea of what we were in for when they said “VIP treatment”, I on the other hand had no clue.  After having had the “VIP treatment” though, I can tell you with all certainty that if you’re going to go to a pro football game… this is how you do it!  We were setup with an executive suite to watch the game from; complete with all the food you can eat, all the drinks you drink, and of course, a pretty darn good view of the action on the field.  Oh… and if you happened to miss something (like the tons of bad calls the refs were throwing down), there were a couple of big screen TVs to catch the replays on.  Now THIS is sweet!

    At the end of the day the Titans barely lost to the Houston Texans, 34 to 31, but there was no shortage of entertainment.  I’m also pretty comfortable saying that there was just as much intensity and passion with these football fans as any I’ve run into at the college games in Neyland Stadium here in Knoxville.  I don’t think they could have gotten any louder (and thankfully so because you would probably be well served with some ear plugs as is!).  Aaron and I had a great time and it was definitely a fun experience!  Thanks again Jay and Ashby for the invite!!

– Dan Thompson

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    It would seem that the Albino Bowler has turned into quite the philanthropist.  A few weeks ago he joined me for the local MDA Lock-up, and this past week he came to the office to participate in a fund raiser for our local Children’s Hospital.  The Chick-fil-a cow also showed up to help raise money, which made for an awesome photo op.  Claris employees were encouraged to invite their families for lunch and fellowship, and for the second year in a row it was a fun little get together.  We also took this time to say goodbye to fellow employee and friend, Jim Garner.  Jim, we’ll miss you old timer!  ;)

– Dan Thompson

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    Well, I’ve made it to Big Sky country with Paul and Jay. It was an uneventful trip – but loooong. We spent roughly 12 hours in airports and airplanes then another hour drive up to the place we are staying. I know one thing, Montana is COLD!!!!! When we landed it was 3 degrees and it only got colder. Thankfully Thrifty hooked us up with a brand new 4-Runner and off we went. There were many pictures of my travel time, check out my Facebook page to see them. I had to doze off on the drive up to Big Sky as it was way past my bed time – Montana is on Mountain time so two (2) hours behind Knoxville.

    We are staying at Bucks T4 Lodge. We have no idea why it’s called T4 or what the heck T4 means and no one else seems to know either. We got settled and Paul and Jay woke me up to go get a beer before turning in for the night. The place was crazy with all kinds of locals partying. Since Paul and Jay are old they didn’t even want to consider hanging, so they turned in for the night and so did I.

    The day started at 5:30AM Mountain time when I heard Paul rustling around. Actually he got up like three (3) times to take a potty break. He drank like 50 gallons of water on the trip – so as you can imagine I didn’t get a lot of peaceful sleep. Regardless, we went to breakfast – which was a lovely continental breakfast provided free by Bucks – and then back to the room to get ready. These guys are P90x fiends so guess what; they did StretchX to get things rolling. It was kind of funny watching two grown men roll around, stand, squat, stretch, etc all while watching it on a 4” screen in Paul’s iPod touch. Oh I laughed a lot watching these two clowns.

    I rode with Paul, tucked inside the front pocket of his nice down vest jacket. Honestly this was a comfortable spot – warm and out of harms way. My first shots came not too long after they got on the mountain as you can see me here with Paul. I got to actually ride the lift too, which was a bit – well FREAKY. I mean this thing is a long way off the ground and I don’t exactly weigh too much and the thing has no way to strap me in.  So, Paul had to put his hand behind me to make sure I was safe. Anyhow, it was a neat day. I got out again when they had lunch and talked to the waitress. She was pretty cool, hardcore snowboarded from South Africa via Oregon.  Those pictures are on Facebook too. It never got above 13 degrees today and it snowed about six (6) inches, but I managed to stay
warm in the jacket and really just took at easy while these guys tried to figure the mountain out. The place is almost 4000 acres and has a lot of variety so they spent most of the day checking out every lift and run they could get access to. This way they will have a game plan for the mountain.

    When we got back they were dying to get in the hot tub, but I wanted to try and make a snow angel. I tried, it was
OK, but with my arm the way it is and the fact that I am a plastic action figure it was challenging. So, rather than freeze I hung out on the side and actually got in the water as well. It was really toasty, which was nice. I didn’t go all the way in, just got my feet in the water. So, all in all it was a cool day. I was pretty whipped too so when they went to dinner I asked if I could just hang at the hotel and watch football. They forgot to turn the TV on though, so no football for me.

    When they got back they started working on their snowboards, catching up on emails and they also dove into a study on Worldliness. These guys are pretty cool in that they try to tie in their
faith with these trips. They tell me it’s a chance to not just go have fun with a hobby, but appreciate God’s creation and have intentional time to focus on God’s word so that they can grow as a part of their trip. Pretty cool – I learned a lot of stuff I didn’t know. If you want to check out more then check out their blog at http://brightonboys.wordpress.com.

   That’s it for today, day one. I hear tomorrow they are going to get me out and hit kickers with me. I have no idea what that means but apparently it will require them to hold me in their hands while they try to jump off something and the other guy will take a picture. I guess we’ll see how that turns out. I will tell you this, Montana is a beautiful place and I can’t wait to see more of it tomorrow.

– Paul Sponcia

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   Happy New Year everyone!  I hope you all had as exciting of a year as we did in 2008!  The Albino Bowler traveled to two new continents, tagged along with lots of new people, was entrusted to a non-Claris employee… attended concerts, went to lake parties, went scuba diving… WHEW! Awesome!  As mentioned in a previous post, 2008 was not the best year for the Albino Bowler’s health.. or at least his bowling arm.  When last we spoke, he was in several pieces, not to worry though, he’s all back together now.  No trick photography here, it’s really attached and moves again.  For how long, no one knows though.  ;)

   Myself and the rest of the Albino Bowler team anxiously await what 2009 has in store.  The glue was barely dry on his arm before he was on the road again.  This time he’s off to Big Sky, Montana to do some
snowboarding with Paul Sponcia and Jay Norris.  It’s the Bowler’s first time traveling with them, so it should be interesting to see what they come up with (pictures are already showing up on Facebook).  Since he’s going to be involved in some extreme sports, we went ahead and gave his shoulder a good wrap so hopefully there won’t be any arm malfunctions on this trip.  As for the rest of the year?  Well… who knows.  Hopefully he’ll add another continent to the travelog (how about a trip to Asia, Africa…. Antarctica anyone???), or maybe a country or two that he has hasn’t visited yet.  Whatever happens though, I’m sure it’ll be entertaining.  The web site has also gotten a slight upgrade with the addition of a photo album.  Several readers suggested it, so we made it happen.  It’s quick and dirty for now, but watch for this to become more organized here in the future.  We’ll keep the most recent pictures first though for easy viewing.

   From all of us, to all of you, have an AWESOME 2009… and happy travels!

– Dan Thompson

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    Well, you just never can tell where the Albino Bowler is going to show up next!  :)   This past week, the Albino Bowler joined me on the set of the WBIR morning show to discuss last minute Christmas ideas for all those techies on your list (check out the clip below).  Morning show host Russell Biven, traffic guru Ed Rupp, and the rest of the morning show team were nice enough to play along.  Keep your eyes open… who knows where he’ll show up next!!

– Dan Thompson



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    You may not think of Knoxville, Tennessee as a real bright spot on the jazz scene map, but as it turns out… there is some real talent walking around this city of ours, and they can put on a great show!  For the fifth year in a row, Merrill Lynch has sponsored the Knoxville Jazz Orchestra’s “Swing’n Christmas” at the Tennessee Theatre in downtown Knoxville.  Special guests this year included; Knoxville’s own, Hallerin Hilton Hill (yes, the man can sing as well as talk!), the “Celebration Choir” from the Community Evangelistic Church, and out-of-towner trombonist Ron Westray… it was an impressive line-up to go along with the already outstanding 17 piece big band.  The concert itself features jazzed up Christmas classics like “O Holy Night” and “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Raindeer”, as well as other tunes you might not initially recognize, but that will have you bob’n your head and moving in your seat. 
    Something about the group that always impresses me is not only the talent that is in the band itself, but the talent they are able to bring in as guests.  This year’s guest, Ron Westray, spent a lot of time touring with the great Winton Marsellus, and was an absolutely ridiculous player… and I’m not really a trombone fan.   Other’s who have stopped by to play with the band are people like Donald Brown, Jimmy Heath, and Stefon Harris.  Pretty neat stuff.  If you haven’t made the concert part of your family’s Christmas tradition yet, you should come out next year… and see what you’ve been missing!  The Albino Bowler says, “I dig it”.

– Dan Thompson

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    The Albino Bowler unfortunately missed the Claris Networks 10 year anniversary party because he was out gallivanting around with Erin doing things like going to Madonna concerts and checking out coach Philip Fulmer’s last game with the UT Vols (as if those can some how compare to the party we threw), so I had to make sure he made it to the Christmas party… and as is normally the case when the Albino Bowler shows up somewhere… he was right in the middle of everything!

    This year the Claris Christmas party was held at the old Green Hills Grill (which apparently now you can rent for events) and turned out to be a great place to have a shindig.  The event was catered by Horn of Plenty, and as usual, the food was excellent, as was the entertainment (Zac brought Rock Band… which is quickly becoming a staple at Claris events).  All in all it was a great time with some great fellowship… looking forward to next year already!

– Dan Thompson

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    Oh my gosh it seems like forever since I have had a chance to sit down and type of my travels.. I have been so busy.. but it’s not always documented.. but I am ALWAYS on the run.. and now with the holidays.. whoosh where has the year gone??

    So a couple of weeks ago I went over to Erin’s again.. heh that new puppy is a little much.. she stares at me so.. I got bored for a while.. you can see by my pictures I just meandered around the house.. I tried to get out.. but sometimes it’s just better to nest.. who said that.. yes even a bachelor likes some down time..
    Then I went to the Madonna show.. G Hollah!! wow was that fun.. a lot of driving.. we went to Atlanta.. three girls and me..there was a lot of LOUD singing all the way there.. I thought I might have to start hitchhiking.. Show was great and then back to KnoxVegas.. It was Thanksgiving.. I was in a coma after that meal.. I said no pictures.. I was a little bloated.. Derby Pie, Turkey, every kind of potoato and family member imaginable was in town.. and of course there’s football all day..
    Speaking of football some of you might have heard that our legendary Coach Philip Fulmer is no longer going to be our coach. So we decided to have a phinal tailgate for Phillip.. it was freaking freezing and raining.. ugh.. the photos are lovely.. although my sweater shrank a little on that day..as did my spirit.. We’ll miss you Coach Fulmer.. tear.

    So now I have been slaking Santa but for some reason I keep chickening out.. although I think I will be ringing bells for the Salvation Army on Thursday..

When the heck is the work Holiday Party??
– Erin Donovan

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